Do you still have your period?
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Randomize
