I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Randomize
