I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
