my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
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