found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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