Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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