Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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