I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
