i would punch a child for taco bell
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
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