She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
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