So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
