i don't like sucking hair
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
do nipples grow back?
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
