Jerry, you need to find god
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Randomize
