My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
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