Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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