Come see our sink grown plant.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
