Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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