make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Randomize
