the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I've blown a few things in my day
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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