I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Randomize
