North Korea, Best Korea!
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
