just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
