have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
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