My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
