Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
