Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
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