he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
