How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
