Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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