He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
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