If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
