meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
