I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
