drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Randomize
