I wannas sexs uuuuu
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
