i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize