I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Randomize
