there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Randomize
