those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
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