Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
