she was so not down for the gang bang
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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