Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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