Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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