don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
