oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
