Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
God I need to hump something, right now.
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