he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
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