I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
