Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
