I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
